Sibling Group Adoption; Met the Kids / Perception vs Reality

Mike's Post:

So much to say.

Today is Feb 8 2018. It's 4:00am. I'm wide awake and my thoughts are running away. It's good to write these thoughts down before they float away into forgetfulness.

It is interesting that our perception is always subject to reality. These two are not always the same thing. Reality trumps perception every time. It is also interesting how easily our perception is influenced once we experience reality. Once reality enters, our perception is naturally altered. We learn.

Yesterday, we met three kids. Three innocent kids. Each are eager to love. Each are eager to be loved. While in the company of a familiar adult (CASA worker), they smile at strangers and trust new faces. They acted as if nothing was out of the ordinary; just another night of ice cream with new humans.

Their greatest concern is regarding the color of their ice cream and if it was melting too fast. They are concerned that their sibling's toy is (always) cooler than theirs. The youngest makes sounds with their mouth that resemble English. Even though we can understand only 20% of what they are saying, they are supremely confident that they are articulating perfectly. Then they look at us as if to say, 'how do you not understand my thoughts? My thoughts are so prevalent and important, don't you hear them also?'

These innocent kids are subject to their perception. Their perception is the only thing they consider. They have no idea of the reality of the whirlwind that is currently raging around them. They have no idea of what is going on behind the scenes.

That needs to stay that way. The innocence of children must be protected.

With the initial visit completed, my perception has also changed. This is new for me and I didn't have any adoption experience going in. I  have read the books, attended the training, and prepared myself for the adoption process. However, none of that prepared me for what it's like actually to meet the kids. My perception of reality was skewed.

I anticipated that these kids were (somehow) aware of the whole deal; that they were in foster care and that we intended to adopt them. The kids' perception was that Kendra and I are just another pair of 'big people' who bring them ice cream. The reality is that these innocent kids do not comprehend their situation, which is all the more reason to protect them. They need someone to protect them from the reality that they don't yet know about.

These kids need a family, more than they perceived... and more than I perceived.

My perception is changing. I feel the resolve building up inside. These kids need a protector until they are old enough, wise enough, and strong enough to face reality on their own. Kendra and I can offer that to these kids. We feel the moral obligation to protect the innocence of children and raise them to be strong adults.

We are meeting with them again tomorrow. We are going to the zoo and riding bikes. We are looking forward to it.

That's what I've got so far. It is humbling to see how fast our perspective, even one we feel absolutely, can change when we face reality.

In comparison, I think of the experience of the apostles in Mark 4:37-41 where their perspective changed.

These apostles spent their days learning and then resonating the teachings of Christ to other people. These apostles learned that Christ taught in parables; fictional stories used to communicate eternal truths. While traveling to another city, a storm started up and knocked their little boat around. They trusted that they would be fine and decided to let Christ sleep.

After a while, the storm worsened. As the storm began to overpower their boat, they must have thought, 'This is no parable. This is very real.' They anticipated that were going to die. They became worried enough to wake Christ and ask him 'carest thou not that we perish?'

Yet, the reality was that Christ was in perfect control. He calmly resolved the problem and said 'Why are you so fearful? how is it that ye have no faith?'

This experience challenged the apostles perception of who Christ is. Their testimony was reaffirmed when they faced reality; that Christ is the son of God and oversees all things on the Earth, including the storms. This experience resolved any lingering doubts they may have had in Christ, even asking 'What manner of man is this, that even the wind and sea obey him?'

It is powerful when reality changes our perception. Learning via experience is a good thing. Life is good.